The Socratic Method

"You ready?"

"Oh, God, yes!"

"Go."

If there's anything better than watching-and feeling- a pretty woman climax and knowing that you caused it, I don't know what it is. I put her legs down and pulled her up into my arms, and she melted onto my shoulder.

"Now I need a shower again, you jerk!"

"I didn't hear you complaining at the time. I need a shower myself."

We snuck off to the shower together. Let's just say that she made sure a part of me that had been getting a thorough workout was scrupulously clean by the time the hot water ran out.

From that weekend, we got in the habit of getting together every chance we got. She worked lots of strange hours, so I gave her a key to my place. It was an unexpected treat to come home and find her cooking dinner in my kitchen, or to wake up to her slipping into my bed in the middle of the night naked from the shower after a long stakeout. I had a key to her place too, and made sure Socrates got fed if she was out at his usual meal times. I was smart enough to call ahead if I was coming over, though, since she was the best shot in the county and kept her Beretta near her bed.

One night over a late dinner I mentioned that I had to go to the statewide DA's convention in Portland the next month.

"Why don't you see if you can get some time off and come with me? We could try dating like a real couple, maybe catch a concert or a play. As much fun as it is hanging out with you, it would be fun to get out of the house once in a while too."

"That does sound like fun. I could get that high school kid next door to take care of Socrates. He's fascinated with him anyway."

"I think he's fascinated with you, not that I blame him."

"Well, he is kind of cute, but luckily for you I like my men a little closer to my own age. Let me check my work schedule."

The convention turned out to be a lot of fun. Amanda's girl enough to enjoy the chance to go shopping in the big city while I was stuck in seminars on various aspects of criminal law. In the evening, she got to wear her new clothes and enjoy the open admiration of my colleagues from around the state during the various social events. The men and women appeared to find her equally charming, although the men were smitten by her beauty too.

"So, Mike, how did you find a girl like that out in the boonies?"

"At work, actually. She's a wildlife officer with the State Police."

"Wow. They didn't make them like that in my day."

There was a flurry on the dance floor, and the dancers parted to reveal Amanda with her erstwhile dance partner on his knees in front of her, his wrist in what looked like a fairly painful joint lock.

"I told you twice to keep your hands off my butt! What's wrong with you?"

The guy grunted out an apology and she released him. He walked off the dance floor trying to look dignified and ignore the subdued laughter. Amanda patted her hair, straightened her dress, and returned to our table looking a little shamefaced.

"Sorry, Mike, I got irritated and just reacted. Can we go back to our room?"

One of the other women leaned over and put her hand on top of Amanda's.

"Honey, that jerk has been asking for something like that for a long time. Nobody blames you. Don't let it ruin your evening."

There was a murmur of agreement, someone passed a bottle of champagne around, and the whole table toasted her. She shrugged sheepishly and joined in.

The next night I took her to a touring Broadway play that was in town. The end of the trip was getting close, and I wanted to enjoy as much of the big city as we could before we headed back. A lighthearted musical seemed like just what we needed. We were laughing and humming show tunes throughout the stroll back to the hotel.

Back in our room, I sat on the bed to take off my shoes. Amanda walked over in front of me, and without warning shoved me onto my back and jumped on top of me. There was a clicking sound, and I found my wrists firmly attached to the headboard.

"What the heck?"

"I once said that I was only going to use my cuffs on you if you were very good. Well, you've been very good, and you're about to get very, very lucky. Hold still a second."

She produced a handcuff key and did something to the cuffs.

"What's that?"

"Double locking. Even though I'm doing this for fun, I want to follow procedure so you won't get hurt."

She started working her way back down my body, unbuttoning as she went. The shirt couldn't go too far, but she had no trouble pulling my pants off. She blew gently on my rapidly stiffening cock and giggled when it jumped.

"Hmm, interesting, but I think I'll leave that for a little later..."

I groaned. This was going to be an exercise in frustration.

"So, I thought I'd show you some of the more, uh, personal stuff I bought with you in mind."

She disappeared into the bathroom and came back in what I guess you would call a teddy- spaghetti straps, dark blue lace and not a lot of it. It set off her tan to perfection. She turned once.

"You like?"

I guess my whimper sounded enough like a "yes" to satisfy her. She looked a little uncertain.

"I know I'm not built like those girls in the catalogs..."

"What, emaciated with huge rubber boobs? I'll take athletic and healthy over that any day."

She smiled and crawled over the foot of the bed. Even without silly cones, her cleavage looked great from where I was.

"Good answer. You have a silver tongue. Sometimes I do too."

She bent lower and demonstrated briefly.

"Hey, don't stop now."

"I'm not done with my show."

She disappeared again and came back in a tiny, bright red lace thong and nothing else.

"Remember that dress I wore on our first date?"

"Hard to forget that whole night."

"This is what I'm going to have on under it the next time you see it."

"I can't wait."

H"Well, maybe we should practice that a little."

She stretched out on top of my legs and rested her head on my bare thigh. The soft silk of her hair was tickling the inside of my legs all the way to my balls. She reached up and started playing casually with my shaft.

"Well, this is fun, isn't it? What kind of cases do you have next week?"

I tested my wrists. No matter how hard I tried, I wasn't getting my hands on her.

"Amanda, damn it..."

"What's wrong?"

She glanced up and did an exaggerated double take.

"Oh, look at that! Needs a little attention, does it?"

She started at my balls and kissed her way all the way up, running her tongue all the way around just under the head. Then she resumed her resting position between my legs and smirked.

"That better? Ready to go to sleep?"

"When I get loose, young lady, you're going to be in trouble!"

"Is that a threat or a promise? OK, just a little more..."

She did the exact same thing again. Then she started slowly wiggling her way up my body, maintaining maximum body contact all the way. Eventually she put her hands on either side of my chest, leaned in, and kissed me lightly. As I tried to deepen it, she pulled back just out of reach.

"This isn't going to be that easy, big guy."

She kept going up until her knees were on either side of my shoulders. She had lost the thong somewhere on her way up my body, and I had a spectacular view. I leaned up and ran my tongue along either side of her labia, finding all sorts of dampness. She inhaled sharply and slapped her hands on the wall above the headboard. Just as my tongue penetrated her, she pulled back again, damn it! Her voice was unsteady.

"Nice move, buddy, but we're taking this slow."

Her hips moved forward again and she hovered just out of my reach for what felt like hours before she closed the final inch and let me finally find that cute little pink bud.

"Ohhh, yeah..."

After a few seconds she slid back down my body again.

"Amanda, would you please let me out of these damn cuffs?"

"Not yet, I'm having too much fun."

She settled herself astride me, sat up, and guided me inside her soaking wet channel. Then she put her hands behind her head and started moving her hips in little circles, keeping me deep inside her. It was incredible to watch and better to feel, but my wrists were getting sore from my instinctive efforts to get my hands on her. As she kept going, her movements were getting jerkier. She dropped forward and put her hands on the headboard, continuing to wiggle her hips. I leaned up and captured one of her pretty nipples, but she leaned back.

"Would you please let me loose?"

She was gasping heavily and I could feel contractions starting around my cock. Oh, the heck with it; I was enjoying this too much to argue. Finally, finally, she flattened out on my chest and kissed me. That seemed to be all it took for her to reach a long, intense orgasm, and that in turn made me to go off so hard I was afraid I was going to blast her against the ceiling.

I woke up to her slapping my face with one hand and feeling my neck for breathing and pulse with the other. My hands were free again.

"Mike? Mike? Come on, wake up!"

I grabbed her as she appeared to be about to start CPR. Watching a beautiful naked girl do that could be fun, but not with the terrified look on her face.

"Amanda? I'm fine, sweetheart."

She collapsed against my chest, and I kissed her forehead.

"Damn, you scared me, Mike! I thought you were having a heart attack!"

"If I have to go that's how I want to do it, but not for another sixty years or so. I think you made me come so hard I passed out."

"Wow. I didn't know I could do that."

"Neither did I. Never happened before."

She pulled herself up and kissed me.

"Would you just hold me for a while? That was really scary."

I got her settled into a comfortable spoon and wrapped her in my arms, and we drifted off that way. It crossed my mind that when I had gotten freaky with other women in the past it had always ended with one or the other of us getting up and going home, but with her we just wanted to be together. I knew what that implied and was comfortable with it. If only she was, life would be complete.

My usual morning wood was increased considerably by the cute, bare female rear end rubbing against it. I kissed Amanda's ear lobe, and she spoke sleepily.

"How you doing this morning, big guy?"

"Great. I like waking up like this."

"So do I."

She lifted a leg, slid me inside her, and dropped it again.

"That's not a bad start to the morning either."

"It sure isn't."

We stayed like that for a long time, moving just enough to keep things interesting. Wild and crazy had been fun last night, but slow, loving, sleepy morning sex was pretty good too.

Eventually we went out to breakfast and then started the long drive home. About halfway back I rubbed my sore wrists and glanced at her.

"Say, did you remember to get your cuffs off the headboard after all that excitement?"

"Of course. I don't lose my equipment."

"I'll never forget the look on your face."

"Can you imagine me, a State Wildlife Police officer, trying to explain to the Portland Police how I managed to handcuff my boyfriend to a bed and shag him to death? I would have lost my badge. Not to mention that I would have missed you, of course."

"Yeah, that could have been embarrassing. I bet you would have had plenty of men lining up to be next, though."

"I don't need plenty of men. One good one is enough for me."

She reached over and took my hand, checking the marks from the handcuffs.

"You shouldn't have fought the cuffs. I could have told you they wouldn't break."

"Yeah, if you hadn't been busy teasing the hell out of me."

"Hey, you had fun, didn't you?"

"I sure did."

She kissed my wrist, and held my hand most of the way home just for fun.

The sergeant in charge of the local detachment strode into my office a couple of weeks after the conference. In the old days the State Police didn't hire anyone under six feet tall, and as a result the senior troopers looked like a race of giants. After talking over a couple cases he was working, he gave me a stern look.

"How's things going with you and Amanda Johnson?"

"That owl case? Wrapped it up a while ago."

"Don't try to piss on my boots and tell me it's raining, boy. I was asking about the fact that you're romancing her."

"Uhh..."

"Don't bother, boy. It's the worst kept secret since Clinton met Monica."

He pointed a finger the size of a banana between my eyes.

"She's a good cop and a smart, pretty woman. If you're embarrassed to be dating her you're the sorriest son of a bitch God ever made."

I picked up my phone, told the receptionist to hold my calls, and made sure the door was closed.

"Look, I need some advice. Can I talk to you man to man without it going any further?"

"You got it."

I knew his word was good.

"Look, I'm in love with that girl and I don't care who knows it. She's everything you say and more. If it was up to me I'd be bragging to everyone. She's the one who wants to keep it quiet."

"Well, dating a lawyer is a little embarrassing."

"Yeah, I know. Seriously, she seems to think that having a personal life will hurt her credibility as a law enforcement officer."

"She's always worried too much about that. She was the first female game officer in this county, and it wasn't easy for her starting out. These good ol' boys didn't want to take a pretty little college girl seriously."

He thought a little.

"I'm old enough to remember when they first started hiring black cops. Lots of guys thought that would never work. Once those black cops showed that they were as good as anyone else, the same guys were the first to announce that 'all cops bleed blue'. As the first female law enforcement officer around here, I think Amanda was in the same boat. At least she was smart enough to stiff arm all those young bucks who came buzzing like bees to honey when she showed up. I tried to tell them that their usual cop routine wouldn't impress a woman who carried a badge and a gun herself, but these young guys always have to learn the hard way."

"What changed?"

"One night she was driving through town off duty and saw a deputy fighting with three drunk loggers and losing. It wasn't her problem, but she called it in and then pulled a nightstick out of her back seat and dove right in. In two minutes those loggers were proned out on the sidewalk begging to be allowed to go to jail peacefully. That deputy told everyone who would listen that he'd want her as his back up any time."

"The loggers didn't complain?"

"Fighting's a sport to them. It wouldn't occur to them to complain that they lost. Plus, Wendy McNeil- you know her?- started a rumor that she wanted to write a story about loggers getting their butts whipped by a girl. They couldn't keep it quiet enough."

Wendy McNeil (which wasn't her name then) had been a hotshot New York City journalist when she got sent out here to write a story about Jim McNeil's elk conservation program. Somehow he convinced her to marry him and stay. Now she spent her time writing freelance articles for outdoor magazines and keeping Jim happy, not necessarily in that order. I had helped her with the legal questions that came up in some of her stories.

"I know Wendy. She's a sweetheart."

"Yeah, Jim's a lucky man. My point is, though, that Amanda was accepted as a real cop a long time ago. She could relax about that."

"Well, that brings me back to the basic problem. How do I convince Amanda that she can marry me and still be a respected officer?"

His eyebrows rose.

"Marry you? Damn, this is serious, son."

"Did I say that?"

"You sure did."

"Guess that just slipped out. Oh, hell, I'm tired of kidding myself. That's what I want. She's a terrific woman and if I can get her to marry me I'll be a damned lucky man. How do I do it, though?"

"Let me think that one over, son. It's up to her whether she wants to do it, but I don't want her thinking she has to choose between her career and her personal life. I can't afford to lose good cops."

Speak of the devil: when I went to the coffee shop across the street for lunch I found Jim McNeil sitting alone in a booth. You wouldn't guess that a big, weatherbeaten cowboy like him has a PhD in wildlife biology.

"Jim, what brings you into town?"

"Monthly supply run. I'm waiting for Wendy to finish up over at the beauty shop. I keep telling her she's the prettiest woman in the world and doesn't need all that, but she insists. Have a seat."

I sat.

"I'm no expert on how women think, Jim, but I know that it's no use trying to be logical about something like that. We like to think it's effortless, but they do work to keep themselves looking good and if they don't do the maintenance they won't feel pretty no matter what you say. Just enjoy the fact that you're married to a beautiful woman and don't worry about what she does to stay that way."

"I suppose you're right."

Jim had the sappy grin on his face that appeared every time Wendy was mentioned. Over his shoulder I saw the lady in question walk in and waved at her, bringing her to our table. She gave me a friendly smile and Jim a more than friendly kiss.

"New haircut, Wendy?"

I kicked Jim under the table, and he jumped a little.

"Uh, wow, you look really good, honey!"

Wendy winked at me.

"You're training him well, Mike. Maybe I'll bring him to town more often. So what are you two talking about?"

"I was just telling him what an inspiration he is to us bachelors. If a geek like Jim can snag a girl like you there's hope for the rest of us."

Wendy kissed Jim again.

"I know you're trying to be charming, Mike, but I married this guy, I'm crazy in love with him, and putting him down isn't a compliment to me."

Wendy gave me a sneaky smile.

"I hear you're not doing too badly yourself. How's Amanda these days?"

I tried to look innocent.

"Amanda who?"

"Nice try. Amanda Johnson, the pretty wildlife officer you were seen cuddling with at that convention in Portland when she told everyone she was going to visit her mother in Ashland? Should I tell her you've forgotten about that?"

"What's the one safe thing to say to a reporter, Wendy? You ought to know."

"Don't..."

"No Comment."

"You know that's like waving a red flag at a bull, don't you? You can't expect me to just leave it at that."

"Wendy, I yield to no one, except maybe Jim, in my respect for you as a journalist and a woman."

Jim muttered.

"Christ, if I knew you were going to use your courtroom voice I would have worn my muck boots!"

I ignored him.

"So I know you won't be offended when I tell you that my love life or lack thereof isn't news or any of your business."

"It is over at Dolly's Hair House. I was naturally nosy before I was a reporter. If you don't want to talk about it, that's fine. Amanda's a great girl. I'd still say you're doing pretty well. Come on, Jim, it's a long drive home."

At dinner that night, Amanda asked me what was bothering me. She was always ready with some good perspective, a back rub, or sometimes a considerably more intimate favor when I was stressed out over a case, but this was different.

"Two different people asked me today when you and I were going to stop sneaking around and go public. One asked me if I was embarrassed to be in love with you."

Her eyes widened- that was the first time I had said that in so many words- but I was on a roll.

"Can you imagine what that felt like after a week of getting to show you off and having my law school classmates tell me how lucky I am to have such a pretty, bright, charming girlfriend? Wendy McNeil asked me about it after very politely telling me off for poking fun at her man. She loves Jim and isn't afraid to say so. I'm sick of acting like we're having some sleazy secret affair. Most of the officers you work with are married, and there's no reason you can't be. If you're ashamed of me for some reason, say so and we'll call it quits. If not, let's make this official!"