The Story of a Button

During a later appointment that took place in Becky's bathtub at her insistence, she even confessed that she was considering leaving her husband for me as she guided my cock into her cunt. She saw the look of horror that crossed my face and laughed bitterly before proclaiming it was a joke. I watched as tears seeped from her closed eyes while she rode my cock in the bathtub. I couldn't for the life of me understand women who wanted the illusion of love while voraciously betraying the very vows of love and fidelity with a man who was not their husband. I looked at her hand and noticed that for the first time since we hooked up, Lisa had removed her ring. She'd never taken it off previously and the sight of it glittering had always sent her sobbing after she'd recovered from the orgasms I gave her.

On that occasion, things were different. She lay back in that bathtub and said in a flat voice that she'd returned early one day and after failing to find her husband despite seeing his car in the driveway, she left to look for Rita. She'd found the backdoor of Rita's house open and seeing a trail of familiar looking clothes, she'd walked upstairs to see her husband fucking Rita in the bathtub.

"They didn't even hear me, they were both grunting and screaming so loudly. He's not been so passionate these couple of years, I thought it was just work stress, but I guess he just needed a different pussy."

I felt a flash of pity for the woman in that bathtub with me even though she treated me as little more than a tool for revenge. As she slid over my hardening cock, I noticed tears trickling out the corner of her eyes. She closed her eyes when she saw me looking into them but the tears continued dripping down into the bathwater surrounding us. I wondered what those tears meant; guilt for her own acts of infidelity, anguish at the betrayal of her husband or bitterness for her realisation that she'd just found another illusion to replace the shattered fantasy of perfect marital love?

After we dried off and were about to leave, Lisa awkwardly thanked me. I gritted my teeth while telling her that she needn't bother, I was doing this because I had to. Lisa smiled that sad smile of hers and told me that she was ending her sessions. I couldn't help asking the typical exit interview question, "Why?" Her response gave me a glimpse of the Lisa I thought I'd known but had been missing since that fall night. With a light laugh, she confessed that while she'd had some of the best sex of her life with me, she'd felt something was missing. I had an odd sense that I knew what it was but its name eluded me somehow. It was that same niggling feeling I had after one of those fuck sessions. After the great sex and release, there was an emptiness, an ache that couldn't be explained and I couldn't wait to get away from whoever I happened to be fucking at that moment. It was almost as if my heart and body were at odds with each other, each wishing to go in a direction that the other hated. Of the group of women sharing me, Lisa probably came closest to understanding my dilemma. No man would complain about having too much sex, especially sex that came with the thrill of what was taboo and forbidden. After all, it was oddly similar to what Willa once said to me when I asked her what she, a college graduate, saw in me, a biker who didn't have a thing to my name when I met her. She quoted some dead Greek guy: "We are ever striving after what is forbidden, and coveting what is denied us."

It felt like I was back to being that cool, badass biker who attracted all the pussy he needed and not the ageing married man who had to deal with the realities of life. But I didn't want to hurt Willa. I love that woman, had loved her for years. I still loved her despite my actions. And my heart ached every time I thought of how she'd feel if she ever found out. But I couldn't get out of the arrangement, it would mean certain doom. At least when I was doing those bitches, there was a chance I could settle matters eventually. In the end, my mind compartmentalised everything. This thing, whatever it was, with these women, was just something I had for myself. It had nothing to do with Willa. And as long as she didn't find out, it couldn't hurt her. Which meant I'd to make sure these women were satisfied and didn't go shooting their mouths off around my wife.

Then everything went to hell.

*****

Two weeks earlier

"You have to help me, Jackson! Ashton knows! He told me he's going to get a divorce!"

"What the fuck? What do you mean he knows! Who told him?"

I thought I was going to have a heart attack, my throat tightened and I could hardly breathe as Willa's face flashed before my eyes. Accusation. Rage. Disappointment. And those tears.

God, I'd done it! My sins have come back to bite me in the balls!

Curiously enough, Ms Dubois's voice sounded out inside my head, drowning out Rita's hysterics.

"Jackson Miles! One day you're going to learn the price of being bad, young man!"

The old bat had been right, I'm going to lose my family, my wife and everything I had worked so hard to build.

"...Are you listening to me?"

The cornucopia of colours that flashed in front of my eyes, as the vision of all I had literally going down the drain faded, gradually gave way to gray reality. Or rather to the near feral face of Rita as she gave me a hard slap. I recoiled as I had a good look at the worst mistake of my life.

"He doesn't know who I've been sleeping with but he says someone will give him evidence if he needed it."

The pressure on my chest eased slightly as Rita's words sank in.

"So he doesn't know it's me?" I whispered hopefully.

"No, but it's a matter of time before he does!" Rita snapped. That tiny glimmer of hope faded as despair began clawing its way inside me.

"Jackson, please help me. I need to do something about Ashton. He will ruin me and leave me without a dime! I don't care about the divorce, it'll be a chance for us to be together! If we had some of his money, we could —"

"There's no us, Rita! I love my wife and I love my family. We agreed this was just fucking." I tried keeping my voice as low and steady as possible. I didn't want to set her off, there was no telling what Rita on a bender was going to do. That bitch was in her own class of crazy.

"You bastard! You just want to use me and kick me to the curb when things get tough!"

I look around in panic as her screeching went up several decibels. Fortunately, there were no signs that anyone had noticed, the neighbours were still in their houses, probably sleeping off the unseasonal heat that spring morning.

Clapping a firm hand over her mouth, I pushed Rita further into the garage. Willa never ventured into that part of the house. It was thoroughly my domain.

"Shut up!" I shouted as Rita continued to glare at me while struggling to get free.

"Look, we were both using each other, it was just sex. So don't give me that crap about love or us having a future!"

Rita quietened down as she realised I wasn't going to be swayed.

"I thought we had something good besides the sex. I love you, you know," she muttered petulantly as she pouted and gave me her version of puppy dog eyes. The only problem was I knew what usually lay behind that expression; greed and a callous disregard for anyone but herself.

I sighed, it was like dealing with a child except no child would have asked for my help sabotaging her husband's car.

"You don't really love me Rita. You wouldn't know how to live with a guy like me, I'm nothing like Ashton and I probably make only 30% of what he does."

I knew nothing would get through to Rita like common sense spelt out in dollars and cents. This was a girl with a heart of gold, literally. It didn't take long before my reassuring logicality calmed her down.

"You sure there's no way back? I mean, he doesn't know about us anyway."

"I may not be the best wife, Jackson, but I know my husband. Ashton meant it. When he makes his mind up, there's no changing it."

The strange light that lit up her eyes as she straightened her back told me I was in trouble again.

"We may not have love but we sure had fun, Jackson. And fun isn't free. It's time you paid for the fun and pussy parade you had," Rita whispered as she grabbed the front of my T-shirt.

"What do you want from me, Rita?" I asked hoarsely as trepidation began tap dancing its way up my spine.

"What I told you earlier."

"But we can't! If Ashton has an accident, or-or dies, you will be the prime suspect! And so will I if anyone sees you bringing the car over here or into the workshop!"

Truth was I didn't want to be involved in Rita's nefarious plans. I hadn't shied away from blood and dirty deeds earlier in my life, but I had nothing against Ashton. The idea of harming the guy after fucking his wife made my stomach turn.

"Well, I'm not going down alone. I'm dragging you and those other bitches along if I have to."

I could almost see those wheels turning in her head as she hissed that threat. That gleam of madness that shone in her eyes made me dread what was to come.

"I have a solution! I will sabotage both our cars. You teach me how to take care of the spark plug and what to do with the brake line. I will make sure he uses my car when he has that 'little accident', that way, no one will suspect me. I wouldn't sabotage my own car!"

That sharp laugh that came out of that garish red painted mouth made me feel like vomiting. I'd fucked with a monster and she was going to swallow me whole.

Rita tapped my cheek lightly with her hand as she issued a warning before leaving.

"Remember, no excuses and no tricks or we're all going down."

By Monday, I had a full blown headache as Becky, Elaine and Lisa piled on the pressure. Rita had evidently found time to threaten them over the weekend. Holding out for the week that followed was hell and when I intercepted an envelope with a photo of me fucking one of the girls I knew Rita couldn't be held off any longer. Wednesday morning the next week saw me caving and the little group met me at the workshop after I had sent the rest of my crew out for lunch. I explained and demonstrated the basics and took care to hand Rita what she needed while I had my gloves on. For once, the group was silent and everyone looked at each other with a mixture of unease and fear. Lisa lingered when the rest of the women left the workshop to walk back to Elaine's car which was parked a short distance away.

"Do we really have to do this?"

"Do we have a choice? Rita will take us all to hell with her if we don't do as she says."

Lisa's small, sharp nod told me she understood. There was something in her gaze that made me uneasy. It was as if something hardened inside of Lisa and she'd come to a decision of sorts.

****

It was only on Friday morning that I found out what the rest of the group's role was. The monthly girls' night was to be hosted at Rita's the next evening. Ashton hadn't made the split official and Rita banked on his wanting things to appear normal for her plan to work. She was to work on her car while Ashton had his card session at Elaine's house with the rest of the husbands. I'd stopped going to those sessions and hanging out with the rest of them when the group fuck sessions began, claiming I was occupied with fixing up my bike and the old Cadillac I'd bought off a client. Guilt was a curious thing and I couldn't look those guys in the eye after getting to know their wives in the biblical sense.

Early that morning, I'd seen Rita sneak around Ashton's car when I was picking up the newspaper. Presumably he was taking her car to get to work while Rita waited home for the mechanics to pick up his car. I knew Ashton's car wasn't getting picked up because there were only two workshops in the area and the other crew was off on their annual trip to Vegas. Rita knew she couldn't call my workshop if she wanted to avoid any whiff of suspicion should her plans go wrong. So Ashton's car was going to sit around in the driveway for Rita to replace the missing plugs after Ashton had his little accident in her car on the drive to Church that Sunday. And Rita could claim, with support from her little group of friends and neighbours, that the car had worked perfectly well when Ashton took it to work on the Friday. Casting suspicion on Ashton was her way of getting a hold over her soon-to-be ex-husband who prized his reputation and hated anything that made him look bad. Of course, Rita planned to convert that hold to a lucrative alimony settlement.

Willa informed me of the party at breakfast while she cradled a cup of tea in her hands. She'd missed the last girls' night, having fallen ill just before. My poor wife had been out of sorts, plagued by headaches and a cold which left her with swollen eyes and a red nose. Lately, she'd even stopped eating. The last time she ate a full meal, I'd found her heaving in the bathroom afterwards. She even resorted to sleeping on the couch, afraid of passing the cold to me and the kids.

"So are you going to the party?"

Willa's eyes fixed on mine as she asked softly, "Do you think I should?"

Puzzled, I looked at her and noticed the tiny lines that popped up on her forehead and the dark smudges that ran under her eyes.

How had I missed the fact that something was wrong with my wife? What was troubling her?

Something indescribable flared in her eyes, something that made the alarms in my head scream. For a moment, I thought she was about to say something to me.

"Dad! Justin's being annoying!"

Just like that, the moment passed. Willa hurried to settle the dispute between the kids and I was left with a knot of unease that twisted in my gut.

****

Earlier in the evening

I was on tenterhooks all day, watching as the neighbourhood proceeded with its usual rhythms. The barking of the dogs, laughter of children and the sound of mowing told me life was normal. At least for everyone else. My heart was heavy with a mixture of guilt, shame and, if truth be told, no small amount of trepidation.

Rita's plan was merely for Ashton to have an accident and live under a cloud of suspicion that would force his hand in terms of the alimony. But anything could happen in an accident. I hadn't done a thing with my own hands but I was well aware that I was as much an accomplice as if I had worked on the cars themselves.

I watched the house next door with an intensity that observers would have found odd. Yet, it all went unnoticed as Willa busied herself with preparing a custard pie for the girls' gathering though she was going to excuse herself from the party because of her lingering cold.

Dinner was miserably silent as I could hardly tear my eyes from the windows that overlooked Rita's house. The kids had been sent off to their sleepover at Willa's sister's place and the house was eerily quiet in the absence of their constant squabbling. The group had arrived next door and Rita had been her usual loud self even though the rest were subdued. Ashton had left the house and walked in the direction of the card game. When I glimpsed Rita sneaking out the back door with Elaine, I knew that was the time to stop matters before it was too late. I opened my mouth to confess it all when Willa put her finger on my lips as she drew me away from the window.

"I think we should play that old game again. I have a story to tell you."

I was so distracted that I almost forgot the game she was referring to. It was a game that we'd played when we first met. We'd use ordinary objects belonging to each other and weave a story out of them. Mine were almost always about cool bikers and their women but Willa's stories were a lot more varied. Memories of how we were before everything became mundane and pure drudgery stirred feelings I thought I'd forgotten. They also fed the acid of guilt and regret pooling in my gut.

"But Willa, I need to tell you something -"

"Let me tell my story first."

"No! This is something important -"

"And what I have to say isn't? You and the girls always thought I was dumb one because I kept quiet. Well, I'm tired of being quiet and you are going to start listening."

The steel that shone in my meek wife's eyes told me resistance was not a good idea. I stared dumbly at her as she sat at the opposite end of the table. In her hands was a button that looked like one of mine. Willa noticed my eyes gazing at the button in her hands.

"I'm glad you noticed. Yes, this is a button from your clothing. It must have fallen off some time ago."

I nodded, still somewhat distracted by Rita's scheme. My attention was pulled back to the table as I felt the heat of Willa's glare.

"The story I have for you today is old as time. Betrayal, lust and revenge. All the elements of a soap opera are present. And it all starts from a button."

A strange smile curving her lips, Willa cut a slice of the extra pie she'd made and placed it in front of me.

"You didn't eat much dinner, honey, have a slice of pie."

There was something strange about Willa, something I couldn't for the life of me place a finger on, but it was there. She was edgy. If I had to describe it, I would have said it radiated off her, like power radiates off a classic whose engine is rumbling beautifully. Hindsight is 20/20 and I was blinded by anxiety, shame and guilt.

I absentmindedly played with the slice of pie and tried to smile at my wife. That odd little smile, a cross between a grimace and a sarcastic smirk, played on her lips again.

"The story begins like most stories do: girl meets bad boy, girl falls in love with bad boy and marries him despite the objections of those dearest to her."

I nodded even as I wondered where she was going with that Lifetime movie plot. The sweet scent of the pie with a slightly odd aftertaste filled my mouth.

Jesus, here I'm eating pie when some people are possibly going to die! Ms Dubois is going to usher me into a special section of hell someday.

I stopped, almost in surprise, I hadn't thought of my Sunday school teacher in years. Yet I had thought of her more than once in mere days. I guess it was the guilt, no one was quite as good as Ms Dubois at making me feel like a sinner.

"On their first anniversary, the wife bought a jacket that the husband had admired for some time. It was nothing extraordinary, but she'd scrimped and saved for ages just to afford that jacket and the antique brass buttons she'd sewn on it to make it special. He was so pleased when he received that jacket. They laughed, danced and made their first child that day."

I smiled, remembering the early years of our life together. It wasn't all sweetness but we weren't worn down by life. We were still able to laugh after the fights and the tears, we listened to each other, we never took our anger to bed. The passion between us was a roaring fire then; passion we were sometimes too tired to feel these days.

"A couple of years and two kids later, the wife makes a discovery that changes their lives forever."

The pit of my stomach fell and I gaped at Willa. Was she still telling our story or was she onto a different story? That look in her eyes made me hesitate, the question hovered on the tip of my tongue. Then it died as a sharp knock on the door sounded out.

The sight of Ashton on my doorstep almost rendered me speechless.

"Hi Jackson. Thought I would drop by and sit for a while. The girls aren't done with their party and I don't want to be the party pooper. The guys cleaned me out and I can't afford to lose more. I've brought some wine though. May I come in?"

He stood there looking at me like I was some dumb hick refusing to let a neighbour come in the door because said hick had been banging his wife.