All Comments on 'The Music of the Mind Ch. 17'

I was thrilled when I saw the newest chapter of this story. It seems the wait was forever but I have to say it was worth it. This last chapter exceeded my wildest expectations. I have read a few really good stories on this site but I have to say this is the best for me. What a really fantastic ending to a fantastic story

So it has come to pass - the end of an epic and enthralling tale. Thank you.....

Thanks for everything!

George Ray

Cape Fear, NC, USA

Wow is all I can say about it... This is an absolutly gorgeous story.

Thank You so much I just finished reading all the chapters in a row and loved it.

An absolutely beautiful tale, I hope we get an epilogue, and I'll be following your writing!

Absolutely fabulous!

I've been coming back to check for so long I had almost given up hope that you'd ever finish it. Perfect ending to a great story!

Hope you continue to write.

The best ending to a great story. Pure evil being overcome by orgasmic love is the perfect "climax". So....when do you start your new novelette?

Thank's alot for this great ending of an great story! I wish you all the best on whatever you're doing now!

truffon

This is the best story I have ever taken time to read. This is even better then the what the professional writers write. Have you though of publishing this story? Good job!

very well written, much better than most of the stories ive read here.. i loved the concept this story used, using music to describe people.. in a word: awesome.

PLEASE don't tell me that's going to be all?!? This is too good to just leave it!

This was not only one of the greatest stories Ive ever read on Literotica but one of the most awesome pieces of literature Ive ever read. IMHO you could earn money with stories of that quality. Thank you for that story.

I am not the only one who cried during at least one... ok more like three of the chapters... Truly an amazing piece of writing. Great character development. My only (slight) criticism, is that I was waiting for one big physical/mental orgy with Jill joining the group (perhaps after a little solo time with mike)

I liked the story and your dialog is very good. You have VERY serious spelling and word usage issues. I don't remember seeing any acknowledgments of editors or proofreaders. That is a shame because all the errors took away some of the power of the story. On the other hand, if you had any editing or proofreading help then he/she/they should be embarrassed because the effort was of no benefit to you or the story.

== Different Topics ===========

a) I cannot understand why anyone other than immediate family would feel sorrow at the death of a serial rapist!

b) I also didn't get the relevance of the hunting episode. I do agree with his father's opinion's regarding the other "hunters" though.

c) The protagonist seems too effeminate for his role. Not because of his self doubt, concerns about consequences or fears, but because he seemed about to break into tears nearly constantly. I think tears have a very important purpose/benefit, but only after the crisis is over. Any earlier makes you too vulnerable to attack.

d) Courage is not about not being afraid, it is about doing what you need to in spite of being afraid. To quote Frank Herbert "fear is the mind killer" he also wrote that you are only human if you can overcome your fear. Your protagonist did pretty well at that.

e) I found the shortness of your chapters to be a distraction as well. It was like driving down a street with a 45MPH speed limit that has STOP signs every 50 feet. I have the same problem with page length too but not as much.

-- srgeek --

What more could you ask for?

My nerdy side was so very pleased by this story... I think more could have been played with in regards to harmonic dissonance with your antagonist and perfect harmonics with the protagonist, but I'm just being picky.

Where did you get such a good idea?

A very interesting and creative story marred by your misuse of words. The most common misuse is your use of then when you should have used than. 'Then' is temporal, related to time. If you can substitue the word 'next' you should use 'then.' Than is comparative as in greater than, more than, less than.

You also appear confused about there and their. There has its opposite, here, embedded in it. Where have you been? Here and there. (All contain here.) Hear contains the word ear. You hear with your ear.

"To, too and two," is another point of confusion. Two is the number, 2.

"Too," means 'also' or 'excessive' as in too much. Note that it has an extra o.

"To," shows intent as intending to go somewhere.

The sentences below shows the use of all three words.

I am going to the store to buy (intent) two (number) cartons of milk. You may come too. (also) Do you think two cartons is too much?

These ideas used to be taught in elementary school usually before grade five. It appears they are not taught at all in the present school cirriculum.

You are correct in what you've said (except for the typo on the last word.) Unfortunately, people nowadays don't seem to care about the misuse of words, even on a site about writing. You are casting pearls before swine, as it were.

there their they're

loose lose

except accept

then than

to too

though thought

Oh wow, i loved this story so much i went back through each chapter and 5stared them. Spelling shmelling. I think when one gets caught up in a story as a writer, its about getting it out there as best you can.

However, maybe a good idea to get someone to double edit it for ya.

This story had everything. Romance, Erotica, Mindblowing multiple orgasms and feeling. I seriously love the notes take on the human mind and id love to have this as my super power :).

Wondering if you will ever write on here again like this. Me hopes so!!

This series as a whole was an enjoyable read, despite the grammer errors. I also liked the originality of this story, and how you createe the image of the mind as an instrument.

alright look ya ya he made some grammatic errors who cares its a sex story on a site that exists for the express purpose of hosting sex paraphenilia and so if he spells a couple of words wrong then just be happy he decided to put the words on the site its a good series dont take it so seriously that u lose sight of why your on this site in the first place sex :P

definately not on this site for sex... would be a bit strange to have sex with words.... im on this site for fun and amusing stories

well written story great concept... just wish there was a little less rape always hated that sort of thing in stories even when its part of what makes a certain character who they are

ST you do have a talent. Reading over the other comments I realized that any critical ones should only come from those who have written, so stick to your writer supporters. Yes, the spelling errors were distracting, but not enough to keep me from reading on with only the slightest of distraction. Keep it up, not just here but where ever you feel the need to write write write.

The music analogy was the best part tho' I came to the story looking for sex. Give me the thrum of a sensual chord and you will have all the synesthiacs at your beck and call.

Haven't logged in, call me Narlo

Great story.

Such a unique concept. This story left me in absolute awe.

best story I have ever read on this site. Thank you for sharing it.

I have just had the pleasure of reading your story from start to finish and not in stages as they were submitted. It was truly enthralling. In the main well written but with a few typos however the characterisation was excellent. Unlike some of your readers, I do not go to Literotica just for sex but as a route to some good well written stories that you will not find else where. This is just such a story. Congratulations.

This was written 5 or more years before I had the great good fortune to start reading it. I wish I knew how to tell more people to try the first 4 chapters! This is the first sci-fy I have read, but will not be the last if I can find sharing of thoughts from such interesting minds. Typos and synonyms aside, a fantastic piece of work.

Interesting that I find a story the expands my concept of the power of connecting and loving support in a location that I had only visited for a sexual experience. Great thoughts written well - I am grateful.

Friendship is magic

Thanks to you, Solitary Thinker. This is the best story I've read on this site. The premise of reading the music of another's mind is beautiful and I loved seeing these relationships unfold.

Very nicely done.

Incredibly creative. As unique as I have ever seen here. Or anywhere for that matter.

Well done.

Been a while since I have been on the site, and I just wanted to say thank you for all the positive comments. since writing this I have become a published author and now make my living writing! I do apologize for the gammer and spelling, not my strong point and frankly I wasn't very concerned with it when I wrote this. I was just having fun with an idea. I know this takes some of you out of the story, and for that I apologize again.

Two questions, would anyone like to see a sequel, and if so what would you be interested in seeing from the group? Secondly, I am thinking of reworking this story with my editor into a novella and publishing on Amazon for .99 cents. Would anyone be interested in that? Send me a private message. Thanks much, and glad so many folks enjoyed he story! Namaste! James

great build up, but I cant help but say I am disappointed at the end

expected more from the situation between him and Jill, not saying a sex chapter, but just something... more

now of course this is YEARS old story, but I figured if someone else happened by or the author decided to take a look he would see... I mean I did just spend the last few hours reading all the chapters in one go! and now its bed time, well a few hours past, whatever...

This should be made into a movie. Holy Shit, I loved it!

I loved the story and the way you led up through all the twists and turns, I am 100% satisfied that the long read was well the journey. I can't wait to read your other stories.

Ed

Compliments are due both for a good tale and for seeing it through to completion. Thank you for the gift.

Very good story ,but underrated. It still needs a little editing for spelling and proper word usage but very good.

I read this series beginning to end in one sitting and very much enjoyed myself. Thank you for the entertainment.

It is a unique idea, at least as far as I've seen on Lit... thought and emotion as music in reading minds. It was fun and I recommend it as a good read.

BRAVO! Well done!

Greatly enjoying the story a very different and better kind of mind control

Hope you keep writing

Paps

I have read Erotica for over 30 years. This beautiful story rich in detail and suspense.

Vivid characters. More history from the son & daughter should have been added in. I do not remember any but a brief line about their mother. Much more thought should have been used.

Thomas. May 01, 2020!!

Good story, enjoyed immensely .

Until the misuse of simple English use. Your instead of you're (you are) & there instead of their to name but two. Try a dictionary instead of spellchecker which only tells you the spelling of an incorrectly used word is correct.

Wow! I’ve just found your story - so got the opportunity to read it in its entirety in one go.

Top marks for the imaginative content. It’s one of the best in this category that I have read in years.

Unfortunately; IMO and that of others, your consistent use of phonetic English and bad grammar, spoiled the story flow. Hopefully you have more active editors/dictionaries/thesauri in your new venture to match the quality of your talent.

Cheers