All Comments on 'Jilted'

5* This is really very good, a different and believable perspective on the betrayal and divorce and its consequences. Thank you for posting it.

(comment continued) I particularly like the way that the children hadn't realised quite what their words would do to her mother. I thought you wrote that very well.

Wow. You don't realize what happens to the kids. Nicely written. 5stars

A beautiful story. Very well written. AAAAAA+++++

Damn good 5*

Wow , that was excellent well done

Good story but very abruptly ended.

Would have loved a conversation between Ursula and Gary

Excellent story and a completely different perspective. The takedown of the mother was absolutely brutal.

Great job. Too bad this doesn't happen more often in reality to cheaters both male and female.

wow that was powerful! something different thats for sure! very well done.

Orignial -- I like original. 5*

Whoa, What a Big Burn on the Cheating Bitch wife. I would of done that also, when my mother remarried with an asshole, but us kids were not invited. LOL 5 Big Blazing Stars. Thanks for the Great Writing. Buster2U

Wow! 5 stars all the way! Brutal ending!

Well, that is scar-ing…

Very powerful story, takes the we don't like our stepdad to another level. Well done. 5 stars

What retribution, children can be amazing. Thanks for your writing.

Sadly, the children are usually the victims of their parent's failures. I tried my best to spare my 5-year-old as much heartache as possible when her mother and I split. For the most part, her mother did the same, so it was less traumatic than it could have been.

The story is pure fiction, what we would LIKE to see happen. Unfortunately the trauma of divorce usually falls heavily on the children. But the story was on point and fun. Five stars

Nice write.

When the children reversed their feelings for David, I was sure they wanted to ensure their mother got married so that their father's obligations to the ex would be over. The kids could then return to their campaign against David.

I'm not sure children could be so stalwart. Still, a nice thought. D

Loved it , the kids had their mother and step father pegged right from the beginning

One of the best reads in a long while. Syzyguy got it right, the kids reaction to having to accept her cheating and her lover are almost a real reaction. You can't FORCE a child to like someone they don't want to like, like a person who broke up their lives. David will always be an asshole to Xander and Violet, regardless of what their mother wants... Would like to see another chapter in how Gary and his kids settle in together while Ursula must contend with all damage done by her 2 year affair with David. Questions must be answered... Beautifully done - 5 stars

I think they should have waited until AFTER wedding was finished. Dad would have gotten out of a lot of mortgage and maintenance payments. Still, a good read and burning of the bitch!

A very well written story, very believable,

I enjoyed this story. I thought using the children to show the pain of the betrayal was a clever twist. Clever ending showing the realisation of the mother that her actions bought them to where they were. Thanks for posting.

The cheater never thinks about the children feeling. Wow what a great story and we'll written

Was a terrific story until the very end - now I'm sitting here pissed off the author just fucking quit the story. Was going to give a 4* - now a 2*

Loved the children's view of cheating and divorce. Great read.

Another chapter needed! 5⭐

If they would have waited until after the ceremony to let their feeling be known, their dad would have been off the hook for the mortgage payment, they would have been old enough to pick dad to live with, and the alimony and child support would have been stopped.

The kids kinda screwed their dad

As a child of divorce who went through it as a teenager, the author perfectly grasped the feelings of the children. Nothing good comes from adultery and often the ones who suffer the most are the children. It leaves scars that never heal. Well written from a perspective that is usually ignored.

In this different tale, from the usual boring fetish-cuck ones, we have a sheep weak husband, his slut wife and their two very smart children. Certainly the bitch wife was the major responsible for the destruction of their family, but also the husband didn't appear so good, a too much do-nothing monkey. So, to better evaluate this tale, it really needs the second part: how much they are willing to change and grow ? Till now the only people showing maturity were the little children, so 5* for the children.

Original work.

Good job.

First time I got to read the children's perspective.

Separation of parents does hit the children hard especially teenage ones.

Nice one, Dalton402.

My ex slut tried that crap with my son and daughter back in the 90,s didn't workout well for her either. They are in their middle 30,s now and still won't have anything to do with her. Not my doing either she did it all by herself......5+

Fantastic! Very powerful! I really enjoy your stories. Only one thing, could you please start including a second part? So we can see how things turn out? I would really like to see what comes next here. As well as in the story where the cheaters forced their kids to go to family therapy. Hoping the wronged parties have happy endings and those in the wrong, well don't. Thanks for all of your great work! :)

This is why you don't worship your kids. They are simply boarders in your life. She clearly was not happy with her first husband, she found someone else to love, she should have packed them off and said goodbye. I have seen way to many blended families try to make it work, the only successful relationships I have seen are the ones where they let the kids choose and let them go. Remember, you will be with your spouse far longer than your kids, and believe me, it is cheaper to send them off.

What imhapless said, including the five stars

I wouldn't have been sorry if I was her child. They told her time and again that they were unhappy. She just didn't care. Honestly, I would have asked to live with my dad long before her wedding. Probably when she brought him around so much, but definitely when he moved in. No way I'd have him at my birthday and such. I just don't understand parents who can be happy at the expense of their children. I never will.

This is why you don't worship your kids. They are simply boarders in your life. She clearly was not happy with her first husband, she found someone else to love, she should have packed them off and said goodbye. I have seen way to many blended families try to make it work, the only successful relationships I have seen are the ones where they let the kids choose and let them go. Remember, you will be with your spouse far longer than your kids, and believe me, it is cheaper to send them off.

This was all their real dad, Gary's fault. To marry someone named 'Ursula' and then allow her to name her kids Violet and Xander, well, that level of insanity caused the eventual breakup. Just glad they didn't have a 3rd kid, it would have been named Bartholomew.

Ooooh….I like this one

I like it a lot

Having "been there and done that" I think the only thing wrong with this story is that at 16, Violet chould choose which parent she wanted to live with, the Courts would grant that (unless Dad was a mass murderer or felon) and Xander would be allowed to go along with Violet's choice. After Mom gets remarried, ending her stay in the house if the Court even gave her use of the house, the alimony ends, the visitation would be non-existant if the children choose that, and things would be ducky. I did like grandma stepping in. Sounds like a good person which were in short supply in this mess.

Enjoyed having this story play out essentially thru the kid’s perspective. Stupid bitch really fucked up.

.

4 ****

Without any specific info describing why she took a lover and divorced Gary, readers can only assume that she was yet another victim of tne MSR. The final paragraph where Grandma explained things certainly revealed that wifey had really fucked up, and that Dave was a real POS.

.

Sure this is just a story, but a follow-up telling the tale of how she manages to successfully reconstitute her relationship with her kids would be nice.

The writing and the character’s names gave the story a dark, gothic feeling. Except Gary, who offered a pinpoint of light for the children view as a font of hope

WAY TO GO KIDS! Too bad it's fiction, huh? 5 stars DMW aka

Yayy!! Finally. Story after story after story has the children either meekly succumbing or being kidnapped. The depressed buckling under totally undid whatever positive portrayal of the children that the author attempted.

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Out of the mouths of babes...the truth shall be spoken.

Some writers get carried away with trying to recreate reality and forget that they are supposed to be entertaining.. i enjoyed that you didnt get caught in that trap.

Seen similar and the trauma it can do to children when one parent selfishly blows up what they believed was a happy life and then imposes "a new world order" that they are just supposed to love and accept while doing nothing to ensure a loving relationship is maintained with the former spouse and child(s) other parent.

Here the kids would be f'd up for a while but with some counseling and love, they will rebound. It's the cases where there is no intervention and the issues fester. Those are the kids who grow up all kinds of fucked up, make bad decisions and adopt bad habits which lead them to people like me. God there are so many worthless men and women out there who have seriously fucked up their kids lives because they were probably fucked up by their own parents.

I don't think some people realize just how damaging intergenerational abuse is to both families and society in general. Breaking the cycle is one of the greatest gifts you can give to yourself, your children and family. It stops potentially impacted others who were spared from that trauma.

Consequences come home!!! 5*

I'm sorry, I am so sorry! I never meant to hurt you. I never knew you felt this way. I never thought any of this would happen. I love you!

I guess she didn't remember this,

You mean he's the guy you cheated on Dad with

I need to understand why you are behaving the way towards David. He has been nothing but kind to you but neither of you is giving him a chance.

Dad told us it is your problem, not his. He doesn't want to know," Violet retorted. "Anyway, we don't like David because of what he did to Dad. I can't believe you are forcing him on us."

So, you ARE forcing him on us!

No one is forcing anyone on you. David is going to be part of our family. I just want you to accept him. Let him make you as happy as he makes me,

That still sounds like you are forcing him on us. You need to accept that we don't like him and never will.

I guess when you are so into yourself you can't see the forest for the trees.

Poor ending.

Awesome kids, lull mommy dearest into a comfy mindset and then lets loose the dogs of war

Yes, only because the kids got hurt. But so did the slut. Fuck her and the horse she rode in on (and probably fucked as well). She got what she deserved. the kids got probably years of counseling. The Bear doesn't approve, but he understands. 5 stars. It is what it is. Hang in there, Gary. Marry the sweetie.

The BEAR

I liked it. Made me think. Always a good thing. Thanks.

Good story! The Master of Ceremonies probably won't ask if anyone objects to the marriage ever again.

5

Nice story about how the others are impacted.

Good story. Nice seeing that pov. That hit close to home. Brought back a lot of memories of things I experienced as a child. Which led to my emancipation as a teenager.

I knew there was a problem when it was revealed that both children detested a suitcase. It didn't get any better. One of the worst written stories I've seen here.

A very entertaining story. But Xander forgot his boutonniere, not his buttonhole! Still, a 5 star effort.

My reaction to the second sentence of the story was similar to that of @MapleMilk. That wasn't the only place that an editor would have been useful.

In what world do women own up to their mistakes? Not this one, they get rewarded for the worst behaviour possible.

There is no world with Ursula as a victim. She is an unforgivable slut an undeserving of anyone's sympathy, especially her children's.

realistic but poorly written.

A very good original btb tale made by the children (the husband was too much idiot to do anything), as long it doesn't follow the usual RAAC way in a possible second part. 5* for now, downgradable to 1* if ...

*Me, searching for any stories posted by MapleMilk*

Sad. Good story.

Excellent! It's about time someone pointed out the hurt piled on others by a cheating spouse.

Very good story. Never disrespect the children, they know much more than you think. This was a great pair of kids.

A portrayal of about the most effective wake-up call for a selfish wife that I have ever seen on here.

It was not the breakdown of her relationship that caused her any angst. Not the knowledge of the pain that she put hubby through.

After all, she made the conscious decision to cheat in the first place, and turned to another man for her feelings of self-worth and belonging, so while she had the elements to continue living a gratifying life, while she felt that she had the support of someone she placed her love and trust in, her new paramour, she could possibly intellectualise how her husband felt, but she could not FEEL it.

A mother's love, in general, is unconditional. Sure, there are exceptions, but not in her case. She was frustrated with them, but continued in the hope of bringing together those who were important to her. That being the case, she thought that her children, while frustrated and resentful, would reflect that unconditional love, and eventually all would normalise.

So to be utterly blindsided when she least expected it, when she finally thought all the elements of her life were coming together... when her love for her fresh, extra-value-added new life partner was not matched by his own commitment... and when it was wrought upon her by the two people who she would least expect to betray her...

Well!!!! Maybe now she gets to experience those feelings of utter loss, total insecurity, abandonment and failure that she was the cause of, for the one she promised to stand beside through thick and thin.

I don't feel sorry for her in the slightest. Dragging her husband through two years of hell, then bringing about the demise of her marriage, means that she deserves a long, painful, lonely lesson as to what it means to live with integrity and honour, even if the lesson is lost on her self-centred mindset.

There is no escaping the reality that this story truly describes a lesson in regret and pain, where most of these stories have a shallow, unlikely self-awakening. A reaction where the betrayer always maintained a core of need for her current beau, but was just playing the wild child. Playing the 'you don't own me' card to get what they want, but keep what they had, even if it's only security and money.

Very, very well imagined and conceptualised. Even the final reactions of the children were realistic, where they didn't really understand the consequence of their decisions until it was done.

It's the lack of a real, eviscerating, absolute visitation of consequences to the women in these stories that make a reconciliation unlikely, and when written, seem hollow.

This one... this woman... well, now she gets to live with the reality of what she has done to her own life, and to the lives of those she is meant to honour and cherish.

And guess what?

There is no way in hell it leads to reconciliation anyway.

This is not a BTB, but she is just about the most burnt of all of these characters I have ever seen. Her whole life is going to be defined by this outcome, even when, or if, she becomes somewhat functional.

A big 5 stars.

@MapleMilk, oh ye of little understanding.

There's no legal basis to stop a wedding based on an objection. This is a tradition where legitimate concerns, such as legal or kinship questions can be addressed. Moreover, no minor child can object. Cute idea but poorly executed. In 99% of these cases, Mom sends the kids to live with Dad while she shacks up with her affair partner.

A very good story. A few editing objects buy hey the mind reads the thought even though some words maybe incorrect. Still a 5 from here.

I love it

this is a great story as it's so very true in that the kids have to at least tolerate you for it to work if they don't it's going to be a very difficult relationship

Should have let them marry to save the dad alimony....

Great powerful story.

Pretty good story. The ending seemed pretty abrupt. To Splitgeode, a button hole is British for boutonniere

Now those are some great kids!!!

Enjoyed the storyline. Not many stories that the kids handle their cheating parents.

I liked this story, it looks at the effects of cheating from an angle not done much, from the kids point of view.

Trying to get kids (especially teenagers) to like and accept the person that one of the parents cheated with is always going to be an uphill battle regardless of if that person is nice or not

The person is still the reason they don't live with both parents ....... 5*

@The_John_Yossarian, your observation of any legal obligation is irrelevant.

It was not supposed to in the story.

It was the emotional and moral impact that the kids were going for, calling out their opposition before the same crowd, and the same 'authority' as the ones that the marriage was taking place before.

They were just letting everyone know how they felt and why, bringing shame to both the union and the couple.

What a stigma it would be to have your own children stand up and do that to you, in front of the very people who meant the most to the couple. The very people who they had invited to witness the solemnising of their intentions.

It's not some jilted lover, it's her children.

How often, in the real world, do you think an objection is vocalised at a marriage ceremony? It would have to be statistically zero.

So while it means 'nothing' in legal terms (just like the vows themselves don't really provide any legal protection, but instead just create legal obligations... mostly on the hubby), there was no legal obligation to force the wedding through either. Until you sign the paperwork, anyone can walk away.

And that is what happened here.

Their proclamation, their opposition, was too much for Loverboy and he folded.

Didn't even matter if he didn't, their marriage was stained, with all of the important people cognisant of that.

Minor children or not, they stood and spoke. They were not sitting bound in their seats with gaffer tape over their mouths. Nobody could have stopped them unless they were kept away altogether. They got their objective. They outed their mother publicly.

The prosecution rests.

I see we have another word leaver-outer

"Good see you kids again" good to see you kids again

should more time with their father

SPEND

Good story very bad writing

Excellent

Sorry - I thought it ridiculous. First I agree with Frank66. Horrid choice of names. More importantly Ursula was a completely unbelievable character. No one is that stupid or delusional. EVERYONE knows that the kids of divorce, especially teenagers, will always be suspect of either parents new love interest. David should have known that as well as would most fully functioning adults. I am a product of divorced parents and am divorced with kids myself. You always tread very carefully with new boyfriends/girlfriends, especially under the circumstances in your story. Either she was delusional, as I stated earlier or didn't know her kids at all - probably both. If that were the case Gary would probably never had even married her.

The Ursula and David characters were just too contrived for me to enjoy the story.

You need an editor, not only to catch missing and misspelled words and grammatical errors, but also to fix the name confusion and changes of the characters... all of these took away from the story.

The theme wasn't bad, but the blithe forcing of the boyfriend onto the kids and total insensitivity of the cheating wife was guaranteed to create hostility by the kids to a man they saw as an interloper they were not going to accept.

Cecent story, enjoyed a very different take than is usual. Forget the grammar and spelling police, they almost certainly live to criticise and don't write a jot.

Thanks for your story.

I enjoyed this story. It illustrated perception and perspective of kids. This is a very real shining example of shit that can happen. Kids are not dumb. Especially when they are at ages such as these kids. They have developed a sense of right from wrong and when seeds of distrust are planted in kids they take off like kudzu . They begin to understand what a bribe is adding to the distrust. So those of you that disagree try pulling off what the adult characters did then write your own story and let us know how you make out. Ok a maybe a couple of editing mistakes. Big fucking deal. For you anal retentive poopheads just look at content for once. The story's theme is as old as time itself. Good story.

5 stars. I would have preferred more damage to the cheating skank (she STILL got most of the custody AND financially raped her husband despite being the criminal - welcome to the man hating in-"justice" system. But the fact that the kids - unlike most LW stories - were firmly on the side of the victim, redeems the story and makes it a good read. Hope she just goes insane so the father can get full custody of them.

A very interesting twist on the cheating saga. If I was the husband, I would have been rooting for her to get married, so the bitch didn’t get alimony. But cheating with the hoe for two years, then expecting her kids to warm up to her, was quite unrealistic. And her boyfriend expecting her to leave her kids behind, was also not going to put him, in a positive light. But even though his judgement could be called into question, WHY would he even contemplate marriage, when the kids hated him so much. I can’t see this ending on a positive note, for ex- wifey.

5 stars.

With your story you gave a little insight into the emotional world of those caused by a cheater. Not only is the partner injured, but many others as well. You implemented the insight excellently and gave the “victims” a voice! Well done!!!

Great story! Very well written!

I loved it. It was very well written, and the wife/mother never listened to the kids either. They tried, but you can't reach some people sometimes. I've seen it happen in real life too.

Not bad for a utopian dream.

It's not like this never happens. This happens everyday.

Mom was brutally honest at the end.

The concept was an excellent one. Placing the focus on the children’s emotions consequential to a parent’s breaking a marriage through infidelity, and exploring how deep and enduring their resentment towards the third party might be. For that you were looking at five stars, but the need for an editor to catch the distracting errors is obvious (I’m led to believe the the site offers assistance in finding someone willing to volunteer for this), also there was just something thin and/or incomplete about parts of the story (per some previous posters’ comments) which detracted. In the end, three stars.

Keep going, there’s something of a writing talent there, just needs some help to fulfil its potential methinks.

Jim

Very good in that it makes us think about what the children "feel in a situation like this. Or a situation where a cheating spouse tries to poison a child's mind against the ex.

It seems that the authors of literotica are finally understanding that children feel infidelity. First with Delton 402's Happy Little Family, and now with this one. Congratulations, 5 stars

3 Stars on this one . I met a nice lady at a Bar as she was mad at her husband for cheating on her . I listened to her and had the Bartender get her some coffee to drink . She had two kids a boy named Tommy and a daughter named Chanel . Once she sobered up I sent her home cussing her husband for screwing her up like that . Then the Bartender informed me that she had cheated on him about 10 times at least . I also found out he was in the service in the middle east . I never went near her again and she called me and the bar and we both said i was engaged