All Comments on 'Mike and Chris Together'

I really enjoyed your story. The description of them pressing together at the dance did it for me.

One thing to watch out for is reusing themes. Because both of them experienced the same thing it ended up seeming a little repetitive. That said that was a very small thing and it can easily be overlooked.

I hope to see more.

i loved it, wished it was me the entire time such a turn on want more, wish i could experience it in real life

I really did not like this much at all.

The concept and content of the story was alright, but the writing style is just plain odd, awkward, and stilted. Maybe it was the overuse of comma splices, I don't know, but it it just did not flow right.

is fair play.

This story got me going and had enough descriptive details to carry the plot. I was aroused by the action and thoroughly enjoyed it. You might try adding detail to the clothing, body/appearance, & environment. Much of the detail described their "inner landscape". Not a bad thing, in and of itself, but more, focusing on the character's histories and the above mentioned items would have brought it alive. (e.g., what does Mike do for a living does he have a family, Same for Chris, and what about other relationships she's had) Just a couple of suggestions. But make no mistake. The intimacy you conveyed definitely carried the day and made it very enjoyable. Thanks, and I hope to read more of your creations.

This was an awesome and arousing story and i had a great time reading it. I wanted and wished i could experience this! Keep them coming

I just recently found your Mike series and you don't have them grouped under a common heading. Unless I'm missing something, it took you 7 years to bring us to this chapter. By now, Monica is a middle age lady and we have no idea what happened to her, Stella and Jenna.

It's fine and dandy to be a prolific writer but have some consideration for your readers. Group related stories under a common heading so we can follow them better. Also, if you start a series, don't drag it out 7 years. Bring it to its conclusion before you start writing something else.

Still, your writing is very good and I get hard reading all of them.