All Comments on 'My Voyage of Submission Ch. 10'

Another fine story with introduction for more.

I was wondering if Thors_Fist could come up with a chapter as good as the previous Chapter 9? He's apparently a magician, and to borrow a word from Beth from the chapter where they were at the Jourdan home, "Abracadabra!" What a great read!

I can’t really find the right words to describe the impact of this chapter and indeed the story overall but wow and outstanding are pretty damn close.

The complexities of the plotlines are brilliant, there’s so much more to it than a simple sexy story. Aside from the very obvious global issue of human trafficking the persistent (and very welcome) reminders of don’t judge the sex lives of others because you have no right to judge, is easily as relevant as the atrocities of involving involuntary slavery.

I think I have something of a crush of your mind. Thanks again (5 stars feels like a low score) for sharing.

Tess (uk)

Hey, another great chapter....enjoyed it a lot. The story just keeps getting better. What happen to Johanna was terrible but I think you handled it well explaining why they couldn't do anything without a huge risk to the boat and crew. Sahar's dressing down of Johanna felt right on point. I think Sahar is turning into a wonderful character. I see her maybe spinning out of control unless someone takes a firm hand and helps channel her anger. I would expect slavers of the world should beware a she demon might visit them in the night and remove there family jewels.

Second reading was even better. Much tension, linguistic lessons, a horrid and unnerving night. It is a joy to read Sahar operate as she does. I'm in awe.

As Tess (UK) says it has everything plus including a long discourse on the English language. Sahar's going to be a real asset I think.

I wish I could find a sixth star to put on this chapter. Best one yet!

First off, this is the 4th or 5th time reading this; I've also read WBDP + AToS several times too. They are some of the best writing on this site - good, credible stories, well-thought-out plotlines, pretty good English. I've given all chapters five stars.

OK - the chapter with the English lesson. You need to get your apostrophes sorted out - not a euphemism! The apostrophe (') is used as a stand-in/placeholder for a dropped letter, as in ne'er-do-well, where the apostrophe stands in for the dropped 'v'. So, as you correctly explained, "they are" becomes "they're", etc. Apostrophes are not used before the 's' in plurals - so "the Hoffler's" (as used in this chapter) is incorrect; it means "belonging to the Hoffler". In this sense, the apostrophe stands in for letters dropped so long ago we've forgotten them - "Ben, his hat" is always "Ben's hat", with the apostrophe standing for the missing letters. Likewise, "the table, its leg" becomes "the table's leg". This breaks down with females - "Johanna's hat" is derived from either "Johanna, his hat" or Johanna, hers hat", neither of which is satisfactory, but perhaps a relic of outdated sexism fossilised in the language. Modern usage sometimes allows for an apostrophe when giving the plural of an acronym - "blowjobs" becoming "bj's", for example - where needed for clarity, but it's not really correct, and shouldn't be used where not so required. SEAL's means "belonging to the SEAL"; more than one SEAL is "SEALs".

There is a school of thought (at least in the UK) that says something to the effect that "any form which is widely used is correct", but IMO, that, carried to extremes, would leave the language as an incomprehensible string of letters with no information content.

(Please check applicability of the above with US usage; I'm in the UK)

Love your writing - and most of your stories - thanks for sharing.

Dixon (UK)

It just keeps getting better. You have packed so much into this chapter it is almost overwhelming. I was hoping the bad guys would experience more of the hellfire our heroes are able to bring forth. I hope that is coming in the future, although I know the ship will be moving on. Sahar wins my award for best new character. There just arent enough hours in the day to enjoy your stuff. Great read, great writing.