All Comments on 'The Two-Headed Monster'

Great story.

Great little tale....delightful progression and FAB climax and denouement!! Don't stop with the contest...keep on writing!!

Just a note to let you know how much I liked your story. So much character. So accurate to girls that age and so very sexy. Really good from start to finish and a wonderful pleasure to read. Thanks so much for sharing your work with us!

Francis_Toliver

I am dieing to hear more about these two and good luck with the contest!

I loved this story .It was a nice sweet story well worth the time it took to read it . Hope you do good in the contest .I am going to add this to my favorites list .Again Great Story ..

Very rich characters. Highly relatable. This story had quite the trick and the perfect amount of treat. Great submission to the contest. A winner in my book. Like a previous comment, I truly look forward to hearing more from these 2 sometime in the near future. Congratulations and keep up the memorable work.

I thought that was an excellently written story. With the humor and that natural style to it. I have never commented on this sight. So, just wanted to wish you good luck in the context.

Loved it. Very original and beautifully written. 5 stars all day long!

Reminds me of another two-in-a-costume story, a dragon, I think, but that was just a girlfriend. Sister makes it a lot hotter.

Loved the whole story

A very well written and loving story.

Very well done, laughed a lot...thanks

Very good story I laugh a lot and while written

This is the best story I have read in a long long time. It's funny with well defined characters. It's five stars from me.

Zane wasn't the only one unable to get rid of a hard on during that story.

See it all worked out in the end, though they did have their ups and downs

missed the horse costume

Kinky and yet sweet and loving.

Well done.

I'd like to see them to become a couple and for her to come out of her shell to be her brother's lover.

Thanks for the read

Fan-fucking-tastick! Loved the sister conchering a bad situation. Loved the covert situation. Loved Bro./Sis. sex connection

Just so very whitty and wonderfull outcome.

Just very, very good

loved how Aria wasn't fazed by Zanes hard on! she must have wanted him for some time! since early adolescence I think! similar to a story called "costume sex" but better it might become a classic in time?

Hopefully there's more to come with this story. I can see where there could be a continuation of it. Thanks for a great beginning. Good luck in the contest.

First, I do want to pretty much second everything [positive] commented on about the sex and the scenario. Really hot and really sexy.

But I also want to say I loved the characters - Zane's earnest ham handed-ness and Aria's wit, quick thinking, and ability throw down the curses and insults at the drop of a hat made them incredibly fun together and actually made the sex even better when it happened.

5 stars and a hopeful request for an eventual follow-up.

Super story. Awesome job on building their relationship. One of the best stories on here. This story was a lot more than sex that's what made it so good. I hope this is the winner. Five stars for sure

I got a great big hard cock from reading this gem! Erotic and sexy as hell! Please have Aria give his Big Jake a sensual handjob in part 2!

This is one for recognition...very well done!

This has got to be the winner.

Great story! Enjoyed how the story and the characters evolved and flowed..... Dentally need to continue the story as well. Waiting chapter 2.

Personally I think the other contestants are going to be hard pressed to top this really great story. Both the plot and the character development were right on right down the way girls tend to insecure about their bodies.

it was a tad confusing at first trying to figure out why she had become reclusive. and it was difficult for me to picture how they were harnessed together with her head off to one side, her head and body had to be diagonally in front of his, his head and body behind hers, yet still aligned at the critical points. but you slowly built up to a monster of a climax.

One of the best I've ever read on Lit! I hope we'll hear more about Zane and Aria!

That was such a great story. Dialogues and characters were so perfectly constructed. I enjoy the slow pace and reluctance to give in, that only made it bettet when they abandon themselves to the pleasure. Good luck in the contest. Hope to hear about how they will struggle with the day after.

In Part 2, Zane needs to fuck Aria's pungent, stinky asshole for a Thanksgiving treat!

I loved hearing them bantering back & forth while I imagined them as 2 heads of the same beast. Very well done, and funny! Good story well told with creative sexual situations. Please win this contest and write more stories...

Very well defined characters. Nice slow build up, sisters don't like their brothers very much, but Aria fell in love with her brother because of his strength of character. GOOD luck on the contest!

More about these two lovers please.

HC

The ending was very clever! I enjoyed this very much!!! PLEASE CONTINUE I WOULD ALSO LIKE TO KNOW WHAT IS IN STORE FOR ZANE AND ARIA!!

That was awesome! It wasn't just a porno, it actually had well written charecters and dialogue, not to mention it was totally sexy! You should consider writing erotic books. :)

This is kind of different from the usual brother-sister incest scenario. Cleverly written. Aria sure had a dirty mouth for a 17-year old, it that trait added to her character. Add to their story of how they now have to sneak around to fuck.

5 *'s on the erection scale.

Please for the love of everything good, please continue this story. Even if you made it into a book, i would pay to read it in a heartbeat. Please announce it i am going to make an account just to follow you PLEASE!!! It's not even about the sex either, even though it's an erotic bonus, but the characters and how real it felt to read it, the way you wrote it, made me hooked from page 1, not skipping a single sentence. Only ONE other story has done that for me, and it broke my heart in pieces on the ending. The thing is, when you're good with writing, you gain trust from the reader, more than you can imagine, and the particular story that I read, the writer in my opinion misused his trust.

This unique story could segue into a great multi chapter long term brother/sister relationship. So many of the incest stories begin with predictable scenarios that this one avoided. Great writing and plot, please consider continuing the story.

Character development is what authors seem to be forgetting. Zane's character was generic.

LOL! Aria reminds me of my own girlfriend, she got a mouth that would put sailors to shame. Karin is 5'2" and feisty, I had to bail her ass off several times in middle and high schools! Guess thats why I married her and have 3kids. Nice story, very realistic, funny and a perfect halloween entry. Please do continue Aria and Zane's adventure, its very promising. Write more stories. -Keith

I really liked this story. I'll be watching for more good tales from you.

I loved it, great work.

Thanks to all the readers who took the time to vote and/or comment on this story. I'm glad that you enjoyed the tale of Zane and Aria and the two-headed monster that they became.

I don't have any plans at this time to write a second chapter (all of my short stories are designed to be standalone submissions) but who knows? Maybe Zane will need his sister's help at the nationals. I'm sure Aria will be happy to lend a hand or two.

~ Seanathon

Such a well written story, truly creative.

Great story! Are you planning on continuing this one? If not would you consider doing a similar story? Preferably another two person costume story. Thanks and keep up the good work.

Creative, smart, funny, sexy. Great work! 5+

I loved it! Of the different costume stories Ive read, this is without a doubt the absolute best!! I was rock freaking hard and wanting more by the end of the story! :). I know this was a contest one-shot, but PLEASE do some follow-up chapters!! ;)

M@

that being having a pair of siblings within a single costume and engaging in sex, you've created a completely different story to the other story I've read in those confines.

Interesting feeling of innocence while at the same time clearly neither being a virgin...

I would definitely like to read more from this pair...

Great example of show don't tell. I had to stop and laugh several times.

Well done!

I thought your character development was superb. And the timing that you used to release various information about your characters was also very good. As somebody who has considered writing for Literotica, I found this to be a great subject for learning the art of characterization.

I enjoyed the whole story development and characters! I would love it if you were to write a second part. There was no mention of birth control. On the pill or possible pregnancy? I love the creampie. More, more, more, more, more soon!!!!!!

Seriously, there has to be more to this. Hell, I'd write it if you want me to. I just want a continuation.

I loved the story. The characters seemed alive. Aria was absolutely hilarious what a legend.

I like the premise of the story, and how well it was written. I'd love to see it extended and find more details about the characters and what happens next. Please write a second chapter!

This is likely my all time favorite story on this site, if a bit short. At the end, there really wasn't a conclusion and I'm REALLY hoping you'll continue the adventures of Aria and Zane! Thanks

Personally, I didn't find it too short at all and there was a nice little arch with Aria's character. The taboo aspect is hot, but the sex on stage, in public, with no one knowing really pushed my buttons. I've been away from Literotica for a while, but if this is any indication, the writing has definitely gotten better! I'll be checking out more of your stuff.

How many times have I bumped across this delicious story, only to feel the burning need to reread it? Tiny sister, BiG brother,perfect timing! Soo good!

This Story it's amazing, but I really would like to know what happend after that night! please write a continuation!

the idea of being Bound to A large man in a bulky costume was an amazing idea! It allowed so many options on what could happen. Please please PLEASE make a sequel to this or another story with a situation like this one. Amazing story from an amazing author.

I just want to say great story, I especially enjoyed the part where they were at the dance. Sorry but the started to picture them in that costume and what they were doing I start to laugh and but the time they got on stage my sides were hurting and tears rolling down my cheeks. But I did love the story

I really enjoyed this story. It was super sexy and most of all I enjoyed the character development. At first I was a bit lost as to what was wrong with the sister, but I had a feeling you would get around to explaining it. I have no complaints about this story and am going to now have to check out anything else you have written. If they are done like this one I am sure I will enjoy them just as much.

You are a great writer, and this was a very very well done work.

I quite enjoyed the story. One of the things I actually liked was that they didn't bitch and moan about it being "wrong" or anything like that, so it came across as sweet and hot.

Very original. Thanks much.

a really great story LOL.

The only problem I have is that a non-gymnast would not understand the harness.

very likable fun characters, including mom!

5 stars,+ fave

going to have to check out all your other stories

I really enjoyed the characters. The story was entertaining. I truly enjoyed it. I'll be sure to check out your other stories.

This was a great read and so was part 2 that seems to have vanished sadly

I was wondering though, why part two was pulled? It was very good as well.

Great read. Keep it up. And you should really put part 2 back up!!

I liked chapter one better, but what was wrong with chapter two? There wasn't any underage stuff in it or anything... Did literotica just decide to yank it for some reason?

This story was excellent. I read Part 2 and like everyone else I am wondering where it went. I hope Aria and Zane's story continues.

Where is part 2!?

This needs to continue. That wasn't an ending in any sense of the word !

Don't understand why part 2 was taken down but I hope you continue this series... please respond

please put the second part of the story up again!

please!

Dude, please put part 2 back up. It completed the story so well. We miss it!!

I really enjoyed this story. I found it humorous and hot and I liked the characterisation of the siblings, it was pretty believable. At times I struggled with visualisation of the harness and the position of their bodies but your descriptions largely helped me overcome this.

I have to say that you lost me ever so slightly when they return from outside and continue with their liaison. I guess I felt that you'd done a great a job in leading us into the moment outside and it was clear that their desire was leading them both on. But the break in tension coming as it did...I don't know how realistic it was to have them resume their activities - nothing in their characterisation really suggested that would be the case. However, notwithstanding that, I feel like you did a good job in rebuilding the heat and the fucking on stage was a great twist, I really enjoyed that.

I've seen people referencing a 2nd part to the story? I'd love to read that. I do feel some investment in the characters and I'd like to see how their relationship continues. Does the sexual relationship continue? Does mom become aware?

All in all, great job. Thank you.

Hello I remember there was a part 2 of this story? Why was it removed? Are you continuing the storyline or will you let some else take the reigns? I know I for wouldn't mind seeing more of what you've got for Aria, but if you're not UP to the task you should allow someone else continue this story. It really is a great piece of writing.

Only just found this story really liked the setup and Aria character, I see from other comments there was a part II or follow on, would really like the chance to see where you take this how there relationship develops. any chance you could re-post or let us know where to find it?

Great story. Reminds me of another shared costume story, Tricked Then Treated by Jackking

If you want to make a series with this go ahead. This can stand alone very well and the sequel you gave shpws you are developed enough character in these characters to make a ongoing series. However, I will relent and allow you to make the final deicision.

Hope we could read part two once more & we'd ceratinly be happier

Great twists and so well written - there is another, Right? Is HOT!

This story was amazing. Very entertaining and well developed. I read all the comments and a lot of people also said that there was a part 2. Would love to see that as well, but if not, this story is still really good as a stand alone. Great job.

hats-off for the premise of this story. it is so hot. you are a wonderful story teller. definitely my favorite story.

Congratulations on writing a complete and completely enjoyable story. I found it to hold its own as a stand alone tale with no sequel needed. Both Zach and Aria were the better for their shared experience at the dance. Zach learned that he could say no when he thought he was going to be used. And Aria made a leap toward self acceptance. No longer as angry and resentful over her plight, she was able to think of and volunteer her time and talent for the less fortunate. Finally, I think it was sheer genius the way you had the kids in the least sexy costume fucking on stage to the cheers of scores of oblivious celebrants.

Cute but preposterous.

I liked it! Although I would like a continuation of the relationship between Zane and Aria... Her with an ex-gymnast body and him with that much strength and control really holds some possibilities. Yeah this would probability never happen without someone noticing but it was fun to read. I really thought that the picture at the end was going to have her making a crazy looking face and her mom question it!

I just stumbled across "The Two Headed Monster" while searching for lesbian kink, a natural since I'm a queer-domme, & just fast read the first paragraph. You hooked me. Then you surprised the fuck out of me. Your characters eere really well developed. Zane & Aria were really perfect & Aria's struggle with a disabling physical injury that forced her to struggle with mobility & appearance were just amazingly well crafted. The ow build from animosity & self deprication to each of them having a breakthrough was wonderful, as was the incredible sex. You write really well. Really, really well.

continue this story

I have been coming back and reading this story on a regular basis for 5 years... it STILL make me cum. Love it. Love the build up. Love the descriptors.

OMG that was great! I even cried happy tears when she told mom about volunteering. Loved it!!!🥰🥰🥰 Thanks!

Wonderful wonderful. I’m so impressed. Definitely a new favourite story for me. Thank you so much. It’s a high benchmark you’ve set.

What a great story! It would be so great if you continue it!

5 stars - great story and well written - please write more like this one.

This was really good. Great job! 😁