by Dalton402
She can't help who she is but she should have been honest with her husband a lot earlier. If she had done that without all the lies and threats they could have split amicably, maintained her relationship with the kids and kept her career. Another stupid person.
I enjoyed that a lot but the ending fell flat. Should have gone on in a more separated manner (living with them doesn't work for me after the slander).
Gwen's career is as damaged/devastated as Amber Heard or Anne Heche. She occasionally visits between any role she can land but the spark that made her "America's Sweetheart" was gone, dimmed and muted due to her public humiliation. The only acting jobs she can get are off-Broadway and in travelling stage productions.
Trish is convicted of child abuse, goes to prison and is beaten senseless trying to establish herself as a dominating presence. When she leaves prison, she's permanently burdened by the injuries she suffered in jail. She travels state to state as a representative for Gwyneth Paltrow's Goop brand.
Angus got his divorce, various retractions of false media stories, a couple of small slander settlements and quietly restarted his business career.
The daughters got their justice, eventually regained a loving relationship with their mother, stayed out of the limelight and were able to get top-tier educations thanks to their father growing their education fund.
With the past settled and forgotten, Angus finds love... with Ursula. She lied to dispel the allegations of homophobia in the media, she's a lawyer after all.
What the hell, Trish gets to abuse kids with NO remorse or revenge upon her person? Trish gets to run the gay gambit for flash-n-fame then walk away from another of her victims? At a minimum Ursula should be seeking assault charges on Trish as the girls are wearing the evidence and Trish admit such to Gwen.
\
D402 you missed some key critical points, obvious miss steps here.
\
2.9*** hooyah, at best
Not a bad idea for a story but it was way too short. There is a lot of things to explore, getting revenge on Trish, hubby rebuilding his life..she also needs to rebuild herself, Trish really controlled her.
Pretty good, but this was a great idea for a story that felt wasted in something so short.
As if his attorney hadn't explained to him that someone who's once made false, still unretracted, allegations against him, would now be in a position to make new allegations stick, in order to save a few thousand dollars.
Sorry, but it was the literary equivalent of a paint by numbers. I havent read any of your other work but I'm sure you're better than this. Hopefully others will find this more appealing.
A good start but feels unfinished. I think a part two is needed. The kids will be happy to have Mom back and not want her to go. Some domestic happiness will return. I think it’s worth a part 2.
Too short, it needs a followup with how things work out for the unhappy couple and their girls.
They should reconcile. Angus is such a weeping pussy that he is virtually a woman.
That was a decent story. I did feel tho that scene in Gwen's solicitor's office was like one bad high-school theater drama. No pathos on that acene. But thank you Dalton402 for sharing this.
The moron husband had been a Financial Advisor but knew NOTHING about what a FA or Financial Planner would know. Most of the discussion about child custody, selling of the house etc is wrong, the way it was explained.
Sadly, if your story involves detailed legal or financial advice or actions taken, it needs to be correct or don't touch it.
Unrealistic that any public divorce having to do with a famous media figure would ever end so simply, quickly, or cheaply. And how did Angus not hear about the abuse before? He seems to have suspected it but did nothing.
Was OK…..but it sure did end awfully fast. And where was any Justice served to that monster Trish?
.
3 ***
There is a difference between ending a story and stopping writing. Sadly, this is the latter.
"I never knew how homophobic he was" - It's not necessarily homophobic to be angry that you wife left you for another woman.
~~~
"he hadn't been allowed to give his side of the story." - I'm sure someone would be happy to have an interview with him.
~~~
Not enough "there" there.
Stunning and brave till the truth starts to come out, then the career nosedives. The thing that gets edged out by the legacy media is that they all knew the full truth all along.
UK readers will know where this comment comes from.
This story contained all the appropriate elements of a story. But to what purpose? To reinforce the common belief that the media exploits people? Humans are selfish and shallow? Life in unfair to those who don't deserve abuse? After taking in all the elements, the twist in the plot was that the antagonist was revealed to be the protagonist. And the former protagonist became a victim of the antagonist and their own decisions. What the story lacked was a beginning, a middle, and ending.
Good start but rubbish second half. Lawyer Scene is poor and the money silly. She was super famous. No indication that she wasted money. Therefore why is she now poor? Yes she may not get new work but no explanation as to why existing wealth gone
This took a situation which would in real life be complex and nuanced, and reduced it to a simplistic morality fable. Very poor.
Martian Lesbian Ray? It doesn't really matter. He got what he married, so he deserves what he got. A celebrity entertainer? And he expected character, substance, and ethics from such a self-absorbed shallow person? Hope the kids got the good genes, what there is of them to be had.
This often turns into happy endings of some sort but from experience it’s realistic for a parent who abused or allowed it to then have no contact or low contact with those in life. Gwen needs harsh consequences and minimum to no forgiveness and I’m not talking about BTB
OK, this fits the BTB model - but there really was no story.
It started out very well - but Trish just seemed , I dunno, mostly irrelevant except as a cartoon villain.
_HOW_ did she meet Gwen? (Yes, I saw the bit about a make-up artist, still....)
_WHAT_ did she do to seduce Gwen?
_WHY_ did she seduce Gwen? female version of a pick-up-artist, or...?
2-stars at best
Excellent start.
The media war was solved much more easily than I was expecting, because of the simple character that was Trish. Trish was short-sighted (interview revealing affair), selfish, and basically evil, as she disliked AND over-disciplined or over-punished the couple's children with no remorse or desire to do better.
Story could use more nuance, and definitely some eroticism.
For instance we are TOLD that Gwen is a lesbian. Write for us how she and Trish enjoyed making love and spending time. Contrast it with the hubby's work, or show Trish to be a good sexual manipulator. Explore whether Gwen is bi-, which is at least a real possibility.
Wrapped up too soon
Good luck in your future postings!
Lesbian marriages have a 70% divorce rate, and similar rates of abuse as heterosexual marriages.
While gay marriages have a less than 25% divorce rate.
We know who the problem
Is
eh too out there for me, actually was waiting for someone to wake up and it was nothing but a dream/nightmare.
People can fuck who they want but cheating is cheating and in the real world, holes go with poles.
Great story that points out the hypocrisy of legacy media which goes all in to take the side of the gay or transgender individuals in any dispute with the despised cis white man. Even when proven wrong, as in this story, they usually hesitate to set the record , unlike in this story, straight. In this great story the wronged husband was able to destroy his cheating, newly discovered lesbian, wife in the formerly fawning media. LGTBQIC++ are the loudest screaming, most untouchable subgroup in the Western world today. Isn’t it hilarious seeing these Queers for Hamas morons demonstrating on college campuses. Maybe most of them will take Iran’s offer of free college education in lovely Tehran. Again, great feel good story.
Fresh storyline kept my interest but the ending, as always seems the case, was rushed. Their final exchange about finances was a plot gap. While her career was in a tailspin with the media, she was still a star and had significant incentive me and wealth. Her husband was managing their finances, do the money problem you threw in was a stretch without better reasoning. 3.8*
I like the story, but I think it needs several more chapters and deeper probing into both characters past and future, and maybe a just desserts for Trish.
Ok, she said Angus would someday make another woman a good husband. I thought they were staying together. Divorce when the kids are grown? Good story, just confusing ending.